Day 12: If you plan it, they will come.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned from this Dirty Thirty experience it’s that people will come along for the ride. They will. I learned early on that if I took the initiative and planned something, no matter what it was, there was always someone else who would join in on the fun–but nothing, absolutely nothing would ever have been checked off if I didn’t first initiate the plans. Very rarely will people have the drive to make the effort and do something on their own, so stop expecting someone or something else to make arrangements for you.

I was, however, pleasantly surprised in how many people joined me on my journey. Yosemite National Park was one of those pleasant surprises. I have always wanted to go and see this outdoor wonder and found out that reservations needed to be made about 4-6 months in advance. I don’t know about you, but getting people to commit to something next week is difficult enough, let alone six months from now.

I asked around to see who was interested on a road trip to Northern California and didn’t quite get the huge response I was looking for. But knowing that campsites fill up quickly I made the reservations and put down the deposit to hold a tent cabin at Curry Village. (And yes, it is actually a tent-cabin. I didn’t even know they existed, but they have them at Curry Village in Yosemite National Park.) I decided I would rather make reservations and take the risk that the trip might not happen then wait and find out later on that there’s no availability and not be able to go at all.

I told myself that if I had to go alone in order to cross this off my list, then so be it. Obviously I would rather have friends come with me, but I was not about to let a lack of support stop me from accomplishing #25 on my list. I figured I was a big girl, I could handle a weekend by myself. It might even be good for me. I had come too far already to be thwarted by someone else’s lack of enthusiasm. Turns out, three girlfriends were game for a road trip, so we all piled in a car for a girl’s getaway to go camping in Yosemite National Park. I think we giggled the whole five hour drive up there.

This is not the only item on my list where I had to make the first initial plans to do something whether anyone else would do it with me or not, but it was the one that I realized that other people were counting on me for their own adventures. In the car ride on the way home they asked me what the next thing was on the list—they wanted to know where we were going next. “This was fun Ash, where are we going next?” These girls had helped me cross off New York, seeing a Broadway play, wine tasting in Temecula to celebrate graduation, and skydiving. But sitting in that back seat on the way home from Yosemite was the first time I realized that my list was not my own, I was not the only one looking forward to crossing things off my list.

I have since discovered that if I am willing to organize and take the first steps to plan and put things in motion, there is always someone who will tag along and join in on the fun. I like to call these people tag-alongs. (They won’t put in the effort or ever start their own projects, but they’ll always hitch on to someone else.) And that is okay. The world needs leaders and followers. Be the leader in your own life and invite others to follow you in your journey.

On the road trip of life, you can pack the car, pick the destination, and turn on the ignition long before and without the help of anybody else. Once all the preparation and menial tasks are done, don’t be surprised when other passengers want to get in beside you and tag along for the ride. Let them. 

QUOTABLE QUOTES FROM PEOPLE MUCH SMARTER THAN I:

“Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.” – Oprah Winfrey 

“If you don’t know where you are going, you’ll end up someplace else.” ― Yogi Berra

“You cannot be lonely if you like the person you’re alone with.“ – Wayne Dyer 

“He who is not courageous enough to take risks will accomplish nothing in life.“ – Muhammad Ali